THE HEART OF AN ORPHAN

Dear Mother of my hart,—

I hope you don’t mind my putting that name on you when I aint nothing to you any more than some little cat you patted once. I don’t know where you are at and you don’t know where I am at so it don’t matter much what I call you.

We aint all hole orfuns in this sylum. Lots of us is halfs and the halfs write to their whichever they got left every wensday. The holes can write too if they got anybody and a stamp. I am a hole and I aint got the stamp or anybody so I will take my pen in hand to let you know I am well and hope you are the same.

This letter will surprise you only you won’t never get it so it can’t surprise you much. I aint seen you for so long about [Pg 10]3 years I gess. I was a little girl then do you remember me in the Busy Bee Sewing Club at the coledge setelment? I sat at the end of the row and got tangels on purpus so you would come and lift them out. You had a smile on you like anything and I loved you. So did the other girls but not like me. I always knew in my hart when it was the day to sew in the Busy Bee Club.

O I would I had a picksure of you dear one and swete but why do I say that because I have your picksure in my head. You were not old or kidish or tall or sawdoff you were just right.

Do you remember that day you went to my house that was a better day than any since. We laughed because you sat on the busted chair by misssteak. Do you remember how my mama she coffd and coffd something awfool. Well she died in 1 year and 3 weeks. There was Tony and Isabella and me. Tony died in the ospittle [Pg 11]poor Tony. My papa died. It seemed like we had the habbit in our family. I said I wunder if me or Isabella will die next time. I do not care much for to be an orfun is a hard life for anybody but I did not die.

Me and Isabella come to live at this sylum but Isabella was pretty and little so a kind lady took her for her own. I cried and cried and said to the maytrun O keep her till I get big enufh to adop her myself but she said no you are too yung. I beged for them to let me see her not awfun but some times 2 or 3 in a yere but the kind lady said no I want her to forget you and all her passed. I no not where the kind lady has her or if she is dead by this time.

Nobody wants to adop me because I am long and black in my hair and eyes. They do not like orfuns to be long and black. I know because I heard them say when they never knew I did. Can I help that mama [Pg 12]and papa was daygoes? I guess not. But Isabella the kind lady said was a little brunet buty so she took her for her own.

Dear Mother of my hart, I heard the maytrun tell the halfs it is not polite to write about me and nun about you but what can I write of you when you went away before my mother died and I know not where you may be.

O dear mother what can I call you more than dear and swete? O dear dear dear mother I love you for papa and mama and Tony poor Tony and Isabella the kind lady took her for her own. When a family is only 2 like me and you mother we must love very much don’t you think? I will close with 9,000,000,000 kisses and some more.

Your long black dawter, Giovanna.

Mother of my hart,

You will be glad to hear your dear dawter is treeted first rayte in this sylum. It [Pg 13]is a Christian sylum, we have prayers every day and py on satterday. The peaces are small but what does that matter? I would not like to be a beggar on the street.

There are 95 orfuns counting holes and halfs. The maytrun is not mean but O I want some person to love me. The maytrun can not do that no wuman can love 95 orfuns how could she?

We have school but not satterday and sunday for the Lord said let us take a rest so he hollered it. I like reading but not rithmetick, what is the good of xampels about money and apples and orunges when you have nun? I like to draw and sing. I usto hate goggerfry but now no more for when I study of any place I say who knows but the mother of my hart is there? When the teacher tells point E. and W. and N. and S. I say which way do I point at my dear but I get no ans. My teacher does not like me too much because my [Pg 14]temper is bad so is my writing. We must be as neat as we are able and never speak when at the table.

Why I made some potry I never knew I could.

Mother of my hart I hate my close. I know that is very bad but how would you like to look like 95 orfuns? so nobody could tell which one you are. I am long and black like I said and blue is not my culler. I feel my legs like any thing and my arms too but I think it is better than rags. I am thank full I am not a beggar on the street. So I am great full to the maytrun and the ladys of the board.

I sleep in a dormit I can not spell it with 20 orfuns no 19 it is no fare to count myself. The girls wash the dishes and spred up the beds and we have a bath in the tub 2 times a month and our neckeneres washt ever week.

Sunday afternune is for visitors only nobody comes to visit me. It aint that [Pg 15]candy is not swete to me as to others but a loving word would give me much more joy but that is not for me. I did not cry last sunday like I awfun do because I thot of you mother dear dear dear tho far away. I played you come in the door in your pink dress the same you usto wear. A lady said onct but not to me she came to stair at the Busy Bees when we sewed. She said you hadn awt to wear a dress we could never hope to own but what is the matter with hopeing any thing? It dont cost nuthing even an orfun can hope. You come in like I said and when you see me you cried out why if here aint my little Giovanna and you set down on the bench by me and I lened over to you with my head and the maytrun says Giovanna have you gotta crick in your neck and you don’t like her to say that so you go away.

If you love me as I love you no nife can cut our love into. I didn make that a girl told it to me.

[Pg 16]

We say our prayers at night kneeling by our beds every body at once like a big song up to God. I prayed Lord bless my dear mother but the girl next she is a half and she said shut up you hole you aint got nun so I slapt her good for I got you darlling even if you dont know it.

All the orfuns are putting up their pens and I must do the same.

Your loving long black dawter, Giovanna.

Mother of my hart,

Since I rote last I had a hard time. I have been out in the cold crule world. Give me a sylum every time. There was a wuman looking over the orfuns and she wanted a big one and she found falt with me for not being bigger now what do you think of that? She wanted some body to help with the dishes and such she called it light work and the maytrun said if she [Pg 17]would send me to school and not work me hevy she could have me.

I didn like her looks but I thot praps she would do for sorta plane mother not the sunday mother of my hart so do not be jellus dear one I love but you and that is true and our secret.

When I got to her house I never saw such a durty kitshen and she made me clean it good and her mop was something fearce it smelt like garbige. I gess she hadn washt her dishes most never. I washt and washt and I washt and her dish rag it smelt the same.

She had a little boy and he walkt on the floor when it was wet and I told him no and he kickt me and I slapt him good and his ma slapt me gooder on the eres.

Finely she said I could go to bed and the sheets was durty and I cried for back at the sylum but it was far on 2 street cars so I didn know the way. I cried and I [Pg 18]cried but I said whats the use she gotta take me back if am bad enufh. I will be bad like—no I didn say it out loud so it was no sware.

The next day I busted dishes like anything I sast her fearce and all I dun was misssteaks and such. Her little boy was much a frade. She said she would brake me but she coodn. She said much more I must not write for it was sware and I can not spell it anyway. She slapt me 100 times on my head and eres but I would not cry. I bit her good and she screamed. Finely she said you durty brat I take you back where I got you and I was glad but I said nuthing for fere she wouldn.

The maytrun was not mad on me for she told the wuman I was not vishus when treeted well. The wuman wanted to trade me for a better orfun but the maytrun wouldn let her goody!

I seem more near to you mother of my hart now I am back at the sylum. I lost [Pg 19]your picksure outa my head when I was bad. I will be good for you, darlling, so you can be proud of your dawter. If I have thinks of you allways praps the thinks will fly to you like little birds. I will pray God to put wings to them.

Goodby with fond regards, Giovanna.

Swete mother of my hart,

Was it a dream you was here today? You lookt a little older and your dress was gray trimmed in pink. How funy I was that I could not speak. I guess you said she is a quere one. I was like a dum orfun they took her off to an other sylum. I was so full inside there couldn nun of it get out so you thot I did not remember you as if that could be.

I can not forget any word you said to me. You told you was happy which makes me glad you bet. You said you had thots of me and ast and ast till you come where I was. I bleve that was because I had [Pg 20]them thots of you and God gave them wings like I prayed. I am writing all so you won’t think I am dum like I ack.

Now you are a goner and praps aint coming back for you didn say nuthing but I ran for the letters safe and tite under my matres and put them in your hand and you stuft them in your little bag made of silver chanes and you kist me goodby that is no dream.

Maybe praps you will write me a letter O there wont be a orfun in the wurld happy same as me! I won’t be eggspecting it and Ile play I aint watching for the post man and when he comes and gives letters to the maytrun and she speaks my name Ile play I aint sure she menes me and Ile say did you call me maam and Ile run with the letter and hide under my bed in the dormit I can not spell it and Ile read and read. O you will write wont you dear dear darlling dear mother of [Pg 21]my hart or I guess I will die I want you to so bad.

Your big old long black dawter, Giovanna.

Mother of my hart,

I got spots all over me from bunting in to the furnishure when Ime trying to know is it true or not. I can’t never tell you how I felt inside when you took me on your lap like I was a little orfun and my legs hung down most to the floor and I am too hevy for you.

You said to think you had a dawter like me and you never knew it and I was awful chokt and couldn find my hanky and you gave me yours and you needed it too and had to swipe up your tears on the other corner.

I said I guess you will write me a leter and you said letter nuthing I was your own preshus dawter and should go with [Pg 22]you and I cried so hard you ast me didn I want to go and I was scared for fere you would leve me agen.

You said my letters was full of puns. I am sorry but I don’t see how it could be for the maytrun is very care full and kepes dope to kill them dead.

When ever I think of you down on my knees I flop and I think so awfun it would be cheeper to just walk round on my knees but it would ware out my stockings and the maytrun would be mad at me and I can’t bare to make anybody mad when I am so happy.

O I will be good to you mother of my hart. When you are poor I work for you. When you get sick I sit all night by your bed. I get crazzy with the clock and I like nights best for I can sleep or eles ly on my pillo and make picksures of you in my head.

O don’t be long gone dear angle mother [Pg 23]of my hart and don’t let me be ever away from you one day all my life any more.

Your own dawter, Giovanna.

[Pg 24]

THE TRANSLATION OF GIOVANNA

Preshus angle Mother—

yes I will be payshunt not to come live by you. I awto be satisfide when you are somewhere loving me and I am somewhere loving you but I gotta sorry spot inside that you must be gone so far and long from me.

I usto hate my sylum close but now no more for its gotta pockit to keep your darling letter in. All day I love it with my hand and all night with my cheek. It makes a wisper in my pockit and I wisper back to it. I must be alright with God for him to let you come to me but I do not see how that can be for I am awfun nawty in my temper.

There is a hole orfun in this sylum with [Pg 25]big moufh and little sents and stufs all in it like a baby. She grabt your letter and I grabt it back. I most slapt her but it ain’t 2 weeks since I was an orfun my own self and she gotta be it all her life for a big moufh and little sents is wurse to adop than long and black like me and I didnt slap her.

My burthday usto be lost but now I gotta new one and its the day you took me for a dawter forever and ever Amen. But does that make me now a baby squawling on my cot? No it is the day when happyness sprowted in my sowl which the preecher says we all got one to be lost if we are wicket.

A new big orfun sleeps in our dormitory the maytrun spelt it. She wears a pompydoor on a mouse she made outa the maps in her joggerfry. She keeps a flurt book and a whiches dream book under her pillo and learns the girls of nights to dream and flurt but they cannot flurt much for [Pg 26]their hankys are pined to their close and gloves fans and parysawls orfuns has nun. I put the sheet in my ears not to lissen because I know you wouldnt like me to. I could write how I love you on all the paper in the wurld and not have enufh.

your feckshunate dawter Giovanna.

Angle darling Mother—

I leve the sylum tomorrow for the boarding school like you want me to. I am yours to put where you pleaze.

I will tell you all that past today. I had a bath tho it was only the middel of the week. We allways walk 2 and 2 and we reech all down the block but this morning it was me with the maytrun and no more. I was much afrade the orfuns would brake themselves outa the windos where they lookt and wigled their hands to me.

P. S. They didnt.

We went to a big big big store and I [Pg 27]lookt in a glass where I seen myself all of one peace for the furst time. I guessed I was humly but not like that. I scrooocht down for my dress to fall more on my legs but it wouldnt.

A lady made a shampoo on my head and a manycure on my nails. I felt cheep to let her do for me like I was a baby and I thankt her all I could and I felt awful nice and funny when it was finisht. The maytrun smiled and smiled like I never knew she could and she put dear on me as nobody does on orfuns.

O the close and close she bawt for me with your preshus money! White pettys like angles must wear and button shoes with tassels. O my toes wigle wigle how glad they are and I bleve I could go anywhere in 3 jumps. And a red silk dress that wispers wispers all the time like your letter in my pocket. Mother of my hart dont think I love you more for the close because I loved you the most I could all [Pg 28]ready. I got so much love for you in me there aint hardly room for my brefh.

I ast the maytrun to let me take my orfun close for a remember what I usto wear before you took me.

The orfuns lookt and lookt and her of the big moufh and little sents put her finger on my red dress and I let her. I am not glad for going. Orfuns is not the wurst compny and this is where you was at 2 times with me. I will be awful good at the school so you will not be mortyfide on me.

your obeedyent dawter Giovanna.

Angle Mother of my hart—

this is the night of my furst day at the Eggsloosif School where you got me put to learn manners and gramer.

I will write some good to prepair you for the wurst. The dining room is butyfull the lights is in red flowers and the plates [Pg 29]is deckrated with roses and the glasses is made of diamons and there is pink babys stuck to the ceeling. The Eggsloosifs wear rings and lockits and bows. They laff laff fast and happy all the time. I lookt at them very much and was glad you put me so high by your love.

Orfuns pass the food but talk not. Eggsloosifs talk but pass not. A lady with teeny aprun must tote the food all round the table. The Principle sits at the end. If anybody is bad she does not speke it out for Eggsloosifs has tender sowls. She writes it on a peace of paper and the lady with the teeny aprun gives it to the girl on the quiet. She brung me one and I thot it must be lessons at dinner so I read it out loud and it said for me to look how the other girls ust their spoons and they all lafft and lafft at me to read it out. O it was no fare! It was no fare! They was mean to laff wasnt they Mother? I never knew it was on the quiet and I [Pg 30]never knew my spoon must fall backward in my soup. I didnt feel my red dress no more. I felt all scrooocht down like I had on my orfun close. I was full of cry but I wouldnt let it out.

Then the lady clered off the table and set it agen with us looking and not helping nun. That seemed mean. I thot she did so for brekfas but no it was to ete some more. I couldnt so I wisht the orfuns had my shair. I tried so as not to be quere but my swallo wouldnt ack.

I never seen when the lady come to me with gravey and I hit it with my elbow and it spilt on a girls dress and I pollygized the best I could but she was mad and she said the ideah of you being goose enufh to adop me and think you could make a lady outa me. I said I aint nuthing but she is and you let her be. I slapt that girl good on the cheek. When you slap poorness she will slap back but richness has histerick [Pg 31]awful for her mother never gave her no spanks so this was her furst blow.

The Principle called me ungreatful protee jay to you or I wouldnt a dun what I dun. I ans. no mam I am a greatful jay to her no matter how I ack and she sorta chokt and sent me upstairs to think it over with my conshents and my conshents will ever say the same it was my falt to hit the gravey but the slap was not on me it was on her to put that name to you. When this letter flys where you are at there will fly the letter of the Principle to tell how bad I was all ready. I don’t care! I don’t care! O its fearce how I dont care and I got tear spots all over my red dress.

I guess its no use mother of my hart. I am not worth you should have such pains on me and thats the true. The ways of poorness is not the ways of richness the ways of badness is not the ways of goodness. [Pg 32]I aint no more fittn to be your dawter than the orfun of the big moufh and little sents. But O write to me that you do not hate me in your hart. Write that I am not all misssteak to you. Write how you kinda like me a little nawty and unfittn tho I be.

your awful sorry

Giovanna.

Preshus goner angle Mother—

it is now the night of my furst week at this school and you aint sent no ans. to my letter.

The Eggsloosifs say I am low to slap a girl so they got tayboo on me. They never speak to a tayboo cept they have to before a teacher and if anybody was good to that one they would put tayboo on her the same. They made a line with chak round my desk that nobody must cross to come by me. Then they talk how low I am like I had [Pg 33]no ears. The class pote says I am a weed in the middel of the flowers. I never cry because I wouldnt do them that much good. I just hate them with my eyes. What’s the good of a Jim suit when the music dont say nothing to your toes? I am so sorry all days that no lesson can stick to my mind.

But tayboos and such is not my big wo. I know in my hart you are sorry you took me for a dawter. I see now the kind you want like these Eggsloosifs but I got no good start to be that class. I was not made to be a parlor dawter to you Mother of my hart but let me be a kitshen dawter. No dishes would be greesy if I wash for you. No floors would be big and durty if I scrub for you! O dear dear mother dont throw me away for no good but keep me for a kitshen dawter.

your back door

Giovanna.

[Pg 34]

Dear lady what usto be my Mother—